Healthy Communication || 2 Thessalonians 1:3 || Manna for the Mind #15

Welcome to Day 15 of my “Manna for the Mind” devotional series! This series takes a passage of scripture (typically 1-3 verses) and builds its understanding through its context and connecting scripture. Doing this helps us understand what the Bible truly teaches us. 

2 Thessalonians 1:3

3             Dear brothers and sisters, we can’t help but thank God for you, because your faith is flourishing and your love for one another is growing.

Paul’s letters were always affirming, even when he had to correct or discipline the church he was writing to. Check the first paragraph of every letter Paul wrote. He always started off with a word of gratitude. He began his letters by stating what he most appreciated about his readers and their joy because of their trust and faith in God.

This is how we should interact with those around us, even those who may not be near us regularly. When we speak or write to fellow Christians, begin with encouragement. Start with a few words acknowledging their strengths. Then, add the clear evidence you witness of how God is working in their lives. Close your correspondence with a drawer that draws them closer to God. Guess what? You can do this with non-Christians as well. It should be done with everyone regardless of what they believe or don’t believe in.

Paul gives us an example of this when he wrote to Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:12-16.

1 Timothy 4:12-16

12          Don’t let anyone think less of you because you are wrong. Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity.

13          Until I get there, focus on reading the Scriptures to the church, encouraging the believers, and teaching them.

14          Do not neglect the spiritual gift you received through the prophecy spoken over you when the elders of the church laid their hands on you.

15          Give your complete attention to these matters. Throw yourself into your tasks so that everyone will see your progress.

16          Keep a close watch on how you live and on your teaching. Stay true to what is right for the sake of your own salvation and the salvation of those who hear you.

We can support and inspire those around us daily, including family members, co-workers, friends, neighbors, pastors, classmates, church members, and even total strangers. In this passage to Timothy, Paul gives us five essential principles to help us encourage each other:

1. Begin with positive statements.

Everyone likes to hear something good. Imagine how you’d feel if you received a letter from a long-time friend and they started listing positive things that were going on in your life. You’d probably smile or laugh, think back, reminisce on those moments, and be encouraged to keep reading.

• Develop expectations of others with consideration for their skills, maturity, and experience.

People will reject or fail to meet expectations that don’t fit them. You can’t expect a round block to fit in a square hole. You need to take a step back, evaluate the skills, maturity, and experiences you see in the person you’re talking with, and develop the appropriate expectations. Be patient with distracted and slow learners, too. Only some operate the same way you do, so make sure to consider all that.

• Monitor your expectations of others.

Changing circumstances sometimes require revised or reduced expectations. When you set an expectation, you can’t expect the desired outcome if something changes during the process, right? For me, it’s like watching the weather. You can look at the forecast today and hear the meteorologist report 2-3 inches of snow and expect you to get that exact measurement all day. The temperature may be higher than expected, with no snow or less snow. The wind chill could be more significant than expected and cause things to freeze. For people, you can’t expect someone to be working regular hours if they are dealing with a life change, such as a death or a failed relationship or something. People won’t operate at 100% all the time, so be sure to use those expectations not in stone but in sand.

• Clarify your expectations with others.

People are not likely to hit a target that no one has identified. People are not mind readers. If you don’t communicate someone’s expectations and then get mad when they don’t reach those expectations, you are causing chaos. Being humble, open, and transparent with those around allows meaningful and genuine relationships to grow. You are meeting them where they are and setting the expectations in a humanistic and realistic way. Be clear, concise, and focused on what the expectation is.

• End with a statement of gratitude.

People loved to be thanked for a job well done. Thank them for the hard work they did. Highlight areas where their hard work stood out in the expectations you set for them. Share the appreciation you have for them for doing this task.

Be positive. Set the expectations based on their skills, maturity, and experience. Monitor the expectations set. Clarify the expectations as needed. End with gratitude. This is the authentic way to communicate with each other. Amen.

Father God, we thank you for the gift of communication. We sometimes get lost in our communication and miscommunicate with each other, but through you, we can find clarity. Please help us to find that clarity and have healthy communication with each other. It’s in your name, we pray. Amen.